Au Revoir

It sucks, but I just keep having to remind myself that it's God's will. I have decided to leave Europe, and my team and go home. I have been in Paris for a week and I have experience great and beautiful things. I have been to the Eiffel Tower and Notre Dame twice, both very overwhelmingly beautiful places. I prayed around and in both areas, and really got the sense that Europe needs the Lord on a whole new level, along with the people here in this nation, it's intense, and kind of scary but so needed and it can happen, and it will with my team, but just not with me.


Being here this last week I have really thoughtfully, prayerfully considered and processed, with the help of my leaders, this hard decision. Being here I've realized and learned that in whatever and wherever you are in life, especially in ministry areas, you need to be whole heartedly, full on commited. And it's something that the Lord decided to bring me all this way to learn, and I'm totally okay and at peace with it. My heart is not whole heartedly involved and happy being here in Europe doing the ministry that we've been doing. And coming face to face with that and processing that I can say has been top 5, one of the hardest things I've had to deal with and process. And it's also grown me, once again, in a sense to completly trust the will of the Lord, and sit back and be at peace with what He has decided, even if I'm like WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON!?

I know it may come as a shock, it is to me as well, but it's something that I feel that is best for myself, and my team. I will never forget the times I had during my training in Perth, or the times I've had during a week's time in Paris. I have learned, and grown into a new woman during my time with YWAM. I am so thankful and blessed to have met the people I've met, to have endured the things I have endured, to learn the things I've learned, and to have strengthened my relationship with the Lord, like I have.

Of course a part of my heart aches, because all of this means I have to leave my team, the 4 students, and 5 staff that have gone through these last few months with me. The team that has seen me at my absolute worst, and have seen me at my absolute best. They all have been a true blessing in so many different ways. They are people I will never forget, and will hold a special in my heart always. I am not a Hallmark card, but I speak nothing but truth!

I leave tomorrow, my 19th birthday, ha who knew! Can't help but smile, but what a 19th birthday! It will probably be a mix between the best birthday, (who can say they had their birthday in the morning in Paris with an amazing group of people, but also had their birthday in Minnesota, home.)and the most not so awesome birthday because I'm going to have to say goodbyes to people that I don't know when I'll ever see again, or if I ever will.


Oh life, what will I make of you? Excuse me, oh Lord, what will you make of my life? Haha, whatever it is, I know I have a new out look on life, and have teachings under my belt to do whatever it is. I'm excited, yet scared to see what is next. For now, it's my last day in Paris, and I'm content with that.

See those of you at home, see you very very soon :) and those of you who I have just met during this season-I bless you to the max. and I pray and hope to see you one day soon in the future!

'However Jesus did not permit him, but said to him, 'Go home to your friends and family, and tell them what great things the Lord has done for you, and how He has had compassion on you'.'

-Mark 5:19

Love you all-xo

Destination=Reached

Finances=Reached in not even 24 hours. That's a testimony in itself. I am so blessed and grateful for all of my friends, family, and strangers who blessed me with money so I could get here to Paris. Once I got all of my money I didn't even know what to do with myself except tell everyone, and tell them what a great God I have!

So it was on :) plane tickets bought. My packing had been done for a few days, which was just reassurance that I was going to get my finanes...soon..and get to Paris...soon. So I didn't have much packing to do. Itinerary read=Flying out of Perth, connected to Sri Lanka, Dubai, then to my final destination=Paris!

Our first lay over in Sri Lanka was about 8 hours. & boy was I the minority! The whole time being there I think I saw about 6 Caucasian people. It was very interesting watching how Muslims live, even just seeing them in an airport. They couldn't help but stare because of my white skin, or maybe it was because I looked like I hadn't showered in days, or that I was curled up on the floor in a sleeping bag trying to get a couple hours of sleep before we were off to Dubai! Dubai was a quick layover which in the time I sniped up some Mickie D's and boarded the plane to my final destination, Paris.

I arrived last night. I was hot, sticky, and SO ready for a shower! It was about 10pm and it was still super light outside. Paris looks just like the movies, beautiful buildings, busy streets, mo peds, small fruit/veggie shops, and of course the shimmering Eiffel Tower which is only a hill down from my apartment where I am now living with my team. I like Paris so far, and I've only seen what is outside my window. I could fall in love....

Paris looks like the movies, but as we all know appearance isn't everything. Paris, but France in general is a very dead country. With a sky rocketing statistics, and numbers, France has a very high risk of divorce, sexually active teens (age lowest as 13), depression, loss of jobs, poverty, and so much more.

It's why we are here. To be the hands and feet for the nation, to bring hope, to bring the Word, simply to be a Light.

I am excited to see what God has in store for my team, the cities we'll be visiting, and for myself. God has already planted this seed in the last however so hours I have been here, a quiet spirit. I am usually not a quiet spirited type person, usually all over the place, always something to say, but I'm curious to see why the Lord has planted the seed.

This morning when I woke up I was so at ease and peace. Didn't really have anything to say, but thanks God. Thank you for the fiances, the view, my team, this city, this experience to come

.....for everything.

Miss you all-xo



P.S.-God is so good.

My God is an awesome God

A week's time to raise a little less than $4,000 for my outreach to Europe.

SPAZ, no sleep, stressed, daily surrendering to the Lord, trusting He will provide, doubting Him, repenting, highs and lows. All this diminished this morning during base worship. Every Monday the base here at YWAM Perth get together and have an hour session of worship, then usually listen to announcements. The Holy Spirit took over this morning, and our base leader insisted that we battle and pray for the finances that about 30 or so of us still needed to see. So me included, needing a little less than $4,000 stood praying for everyone around me. Those of us who are still trusting for finances had a piece of paper with the amount we needed and then people who already had their finances or people who aren't going on out reach (staff) started blessing left and right! The Lord lead heaps of people to give money. The Lord provided $1,672.45 for me!

It was such an amazing Monday! The Lord totally refreshed me in so many different ways! I was uplifted, and made me eager and excited to get the rest of my finances which is about $2,300. I am needing the rest of my finances by Wednesday night, and I'm totally trusting the Lord that He will provide in miraculous ways as He did this morning!

This has been a huge part of growth while being here. The spiritual battle for finances are a tough one, cause sometimes He'll hold the money til the last minute. Who knows maybe that will be my case, if it is, I will still give Him all the praise!

Europe..so soon :)

I don't sleep at night

It's true, I don't seem to sleep at night anymore. Could be because of numerous reasons.

-Excitement that I leave for France very very soon

-I miss my friends, family, home

-It's so flipping cold (it's winter here in Australia FYI)

-I need $4,500 in a week

-Curious about the future

-I've been sick lately :(

It's been a rough last couple of days. Probably cause I am tired, and I do miss home a lot, and it seems to be crunch time with finances due in a week. My feelings are all over the place. Some days I'm ready to pack up and go home, and other days I'm like ARE YOU CRAZY, I wouldn't have life any other way! I just have to bring myself back to His promise. God's promise, when He spoke, 'You'll go, you'll go back into the nations.' It's such a comfort knowing that the God of the universe took the time to speak to ME of a promise. Who knew that His promise would first lead me to Australia for a three month long intense discipleship training school, then send me to Europe, to fulfill a destiny that He had planned out for me even before I was born.

Paris, France is where I will be for my 19th birthday. How awesome is that :)

Thank you Lord for blessing me with a promise. Xo

It's been how long?

Time is a crazy thing. In some cases it flies and in other cases it creeps. With my time here in Perth doing my DTS somedays I feel like the day is just creeping, and I look at the long run and I won't be in Europe for another 3 or so weeks, and I won't be home for another 3 1/2 months. But at the end of the day I feel like I've only been here for a few weeks! And it's been a little over two months! And if you have been keeping up with my blogs, I hope you can tell and sense that God has been doing amazing things here, and in my heart during my short time here. They say that the material, teachings, applications, and everything in a 'normal' time it would be like 5 or so years of going to church every Sunday, and by the time I leave for Europe I would have gone through it in only three months.

Intense

Only word I can think of ha! I am excited to get to Europe. I've never been and I'm excited and eager to see what the country is like. Even more excited to see what is going to happen, who my team and I are going to meet, what kind of testimonys we will come home with, how many salvations we will see, how much more I will grow..

I keep having to repent of down sizing God thinking, okay I've grown this much and I've gone through that, I think I'm done and there's not much more God can do! But he proves me wrong everyday. Some days God takes me, or speaks to me about something a lot more easy than the day before, but either way He's speaking and I am continuing to grow!

I bring myself back to Jeremiah 18, in a couple of sentences it's just God asking,

'Can I not do what the potter does?'

Whoa, of course you can Lord! It makes you step back and be like yeah, I trust that you can do what the potter does, and EVEN MORE! You can do better than the potter, you can create better than the potter, you can shape better than the potter, you can mold better than the potter! It's a great thing to stand on, and something I definitely need to humble myself in and trust in Him that He is going to continue to do marvelous things with me and for me in the next few weeks here in Perth, and continue to do so in Europe.

Love and miss you all :) Blessings.

Father Heart of God

This week in lectures we are being spoken to about the father heart of God. How to look at God as a father and how to reach Him as a father. It's been a great week so far and I already feel like God has been revealing Himself in a couple ways.

A lot of people on my team come from great families, yet very broken in the areas dealing with their fathers. Including myself, I come from a very loving, caring, supporting family, yet lacked any relationship with a earthly father. Growing up I didn't know anything different, and not til I got older did I realize how much it affected my life. While here in Australia, during different weeks I've been allowing God speak into my life about my situation with my father. I have learned a lot of God's character and how it is everything a father should be.

One thing I felt God speak to me today even, is that even during those times when I was younger, while growing up, and even today that an earthly father should have been there, my true and ultimate Father was there all along. I'm not that father less little girl anymore, I am a woman who can run to her Father like a little girl with a child like faith, and He will treat me like daughter in every way possible.

O Lord, you have searched me and known me; You know when I sit down and when I rise up, you discern my thoughts from afar.

You search out my path and my lying down and are acquainted with all my ways.

Even before a word is on my tongue behold, O Lord, you know it altogether.

You hem me in, behind and before, and lay your hand upon me.

Psalm 139:1-6

He was there in all the past times with His hand upon me, and it will continue to be there in the future. It's a weird feeling, but so comforting at the same time. I am curious to see how the end of the week turns out and what else He will reveal to me..

I encourage you all to look at the Lord as your Father. If you have an amazing earthly father you are blessed! And praise Jesus for blessing you and your family with such an amazing man! Or if you share simliar backrounds with me and didn't have a father present growing up

--Know: He loves you, He cares, He cherishes you, He delights in you, He is waiting for you, and that He was always there, and He still is.

Love and miss you all! Blessings :)

He's so faithful

Ohhh it's a fact :) Haha! I'll make that quite clear first-HE IS SO FAITHFUL!! & loves to bless us!

The last couple of weeks have been pretty intense. Intense in a good way though. Every week we learn something new in lectures, and it's already week 8! 1- I can't believe it's already week 8! and 2- I can't believe God is still revealing Himself in so many new ways not only in lectures but just through out the day

These last couple of weeks I have really given the Lord complete control of everything. I realized that I was holding onto a lot things, thinking I was in control. Noooope! Guess I'm not, and I'm so okay with that now. It's good to have such a big God that will take on all your worries, past, issues, and the 'impossibilities'. It kind of makes you take a step back and think.

Currently, my team of 9 and I are trusting and giving control to the Lord for our finances we need to see come in by the 9th of June, for our out reach to Europe! Each of us needs $5,500. It's a lot of money, yeah. But I've never felt so confident, and faithful. I am actually excited to see what's going to happen with the fiances! I believe it's going to be an amazing testimony that I will have to stand on to tell friends and family back home. I've already seen great things having to do with my fiances personally. It's great.

Europe is so soon. About a month. I have no clue what to expect, just like coming here. No clue. But I'm excited to see what God is going to do to me, and the nation while we are there. Please be praying for my team and I, Europe, and our fiances!! Missing you ALL at home heaps!! Love and blessings xx

If you feel led to help support me financially please:

go to www.ywamperth.org.au click on “donate/pay” and follow the instructions on the page. Just click on outreach fees and make sure to note it is for my outreach fees.

Thank you heaps!!